Why do we love and trust the wrong people? 

Nearly every survivor and person in addiction recovery I’ve served has found it necessary to explain to me, “I have trust issues.” My challenge in response is that I don’t need them to trust me. I need them to trust themselves. It’s the foundation of a manageable life and it’s an inside job that requires a lot […]

Addiction is the result of an all or nothing culture

The three most important lessons from history: Change is inevitable Rome always falls Thee inaction of good people allows atrocities to occur As we gain insight and become progressively more aware of addiction and a plethora of other destructive conditions and forces in our society, it seems all the more apparent that we are a […]

How to talk to your kids about alcohol and drugs

I’m often asked what the best approach is to talking to kids about the dangers of substance use and addiction. My experience is there is no one optimal strategy and my immediate response when asked is: It depends on what you’re hoping for. Is your goal to ensure that your teenager never tries marijuana, alcohol, […]

The truth about child protective workers

When you work in social services, part of the wear and tear on your psyche is knowing that mainstream people only feel what you feel when a tragedy occurs. Three weeks later, the news cycle completes, and people go back to being desensitized and unaware. Only horrible atrocities seem to garner our collective attention. Righteous […]

Stop arguing. Start creating healthier communities

There are certainties that follow every tragedy. They include no small number of Facebook memes and debates that are utterly pointless because they never change anyone’s minds about anything. Side note: The next man who calls me a snowflake is getting hugged publicly. (fair warning) Notable exception: Joe Perry, Bangor City Council announced this on […]

No Verizon: all our thanks is not enough

I’m watching the super bowl and as always, enjoying the ads. I appreciate the spirit behind Verizon’s salute to our first responders. There is, however, an untold story that needs to fully surface and the reasons why the story stays buried need to be explored. Research has increasingly shown off the charts rates of PTSD, […]